Sunday, September 12, 2021

Funny Tees

I received a catalog in the mail yesterday from Public Television.  I have been a supporter for eons, but this is the first time I have seen a gift catalog.  The catalog has some very nice gifts in it, but I got the biggest kick out of the T-shirts.

I only wear tees when I garden.  Just not my style.  But the sayings on some of these were hilarious and I might have to reconsider.  

First were the ones that spoke to my math and science background:

MY PASSWORD IS THE LAST 8 DIGITS OF π.

Two chemists walk into a bar.  One orders H2O, the other one says, "I'll have H2O, too." The second chemist dies.  (For those of you who are not chemists, H2O2 is poisonous hydrogen peroxide.)

YOU MATTER.  UNLESS YOU MULTIPLY YOURSELF BY THE SPEED OF LIGHT2...THEN YOU ENERGY.

√-1  23 ∑ π ... and it was delicious.  (the square root of -1 is I for Imaginary, 2 cubed is 8, sigma is the symbol for sum, and Pi)

There were shirts that might appeal to my children:

MOM DIDN'T RAISE NO DUMMY.  AND IF SHE DID IT WAS MY BROTHER.

In my defense, I was left unsupervised.

Just for me:

SOMETIMES I TALK TO MYSELF THEN WE BOTH LAUGH AND LAUGH

IF YOU SEE ME TALKING TO MYSELF, I'M JUST GETTING EXPERT ADVICE.

I'M NOT ARGUING. I'M EXPLAINING WHY I'M RIGHT.

THE FACT THAT I HAVE MORE CLOTHES TO SLEEP IN THAN TO GO OUT IN SAYS A LOT ABOUT ME.

I'm silently correcting your grammar.

I DON'T HAVE MY DUCKS IN A ROW. I have Squirrels. And they are EVERYWHERE! 

WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER.  EXCEPT BEARS.  BEARS WILL KILL YOU.

90 PERCENT OF BEING MARRIED IS YELLING 'WHAT?' FROM OTHER ROOMS.

Now that people know how to wash their hands correctly, can we please work on turn signals?

I sometimes wonder what happened to people who have asked me for directions.

I survived the 60s.  Twice!

And this on a doormat, which I thought was cute:

SEND A TEXT WHEN YOU ARRIVE.  NO NEED TO KNOCK AND GET THE DOG INVOLVED.

I hope these made you smile.  Goodness knows we need more smiles.  And I learned a lot doing this post.  All about typing subscripts, superscripts, Greek letters.  Very interesting.

12 comments:

  1. I love the one about the dog - that is so true. The Schwanns guy always texts me because Laydee does tend to get a bit rude. I might make a outdoor sign that says that. Love it.

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    1. Glad you enjoyed it. If I had a dog, I'd consider it.

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  2. Love the first one (password). Also liked the 90% of being married is yelling "what" from another room. I thought I was the only one who did that. Alana ramblinwitham.blogspot.com

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    1. Well, they certainly had me laughing out loud - and talking to myself.

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  3. Oh yes, they made me smile. I admit that I wouldn't have got the chemist one without your expanation! For me? Silently correcting your grammer, something I constantly do!

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    1. Glad you smiled.
      I read a lot of books online. I am constantly highlighting text and making corrections. Seems like proofreading is a lost art.

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  4. My fav is: MY PASSWORD IS THE LAST 8 DIGITS OF π.

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  5. I would add: 90 percent of being single is shouting, "Quiet up there!" to the upstairs apartment.

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    1. My husband and I had that problem in our first apartment.

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  6. Love the intelligent slogans! 😀 "Silently correcting your grammar" is something I do all the time.

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    1. I have a friend who says 'Sairday' instead of Saturday and it drives me bonkers.

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